I Don't Believe in Santa

I Don't Believe In Santa
story © 2002 Becky Crandall
image © 2002 Kathie Cureington

They stood there in silence,
Jaws near the floor
When their daughter walked in
Slamming the door.
She stomped through the house,
Angrily looking
She turned and proclaimed
That the goose was now cooking
Take down the tree
And turn off the lights
Cause they all knew that Santa
Wouldn’t come Christmas Eve night.
He was only a story
That grown-ups made up
To make children behave
Or clean their rooms up.
She would no longer be fooled,
The scam had grown cold
Didn’t they realize
She was six whole years old?
What were they thinking
Playing such a cruel joke
What were they planning
When the lies were all broke?
Stamping her foot,
She demanded to know
How did they think
They could keep up with this show?
Her parents just stood there
Blank look on each face
They shuffled their feet
And felt quite out of place.
No answer seemed right
And the moment was tense
This morning she believed,
This just made no sense!
They had to convince her
That Santa existed
No matter what others
Thought and insisted.
The whole month of December
She huffed and she puffed
Why wouldn’t they stop
Enough was enough!
She wanted to get rid of
The red and the green
Take down the stockings
Wipe the place clean.
The presents could stay
And Christmas was fine
But Santa was fake
She had made up her mind.
Her parents were frantic
For a way to be found
But nothing they said
Could calm the girl down.
On Christmas Eve night
She had it all planned
She would sit up all night
And wait for the man
When he didn’t come
They would have to admit
They had made it all up
Every single bit!
So she sat in her chair
And watch she did keep
She kept her eyes open
And tried not to sleep
Just as she thought
She could stay awake no longer
She heard a sound
Like far away thunder.
She tried hard to listen
And not be afraid
She went to the window
And pulled down the shade.
Behind her a noise
And moving around
The tinkling of bells
And some other sound
She grinned to herself
As she turned around
Sure when she looked
Her folks would be found
They were playing more games
And having their fun
But now she would catch them
And it would be done.
But there in her chair
Where she had just sat
Was an old bearded man
Holding his hat.
He was wearing all red
With silver and white trim
And she knew right away
That this must be him.
Not like the Santa’s
At the malls or the stores
He was similar to them
But, oh, so much more.
She saw something different
That she couldn’t quite place,
And she could tell he was sad
By the tears on his face.
“Why are you sad?”
She patted his hand
“You’re supposed to be jolly,
I don’t understand.”
His tears shown in colors
Like Christmas tree lights
They danced down his face
But with no delight.
In a voice like a whisper
He told her a tale
About children laughing
Saying he wasn’t real
If no one believed
Or wanted him near
What would he do
For Christmas each year?
He would be lonely
And really quite sad,
Was believing in Santa
Really so bad?
He gave them all toys
Built in his shop
But it was all ending
She said it should stop.
“Oh Santa, I’m sorry,
I didn’t know!”
She noticed his tears
Were turning to snow.
“My friends told me stories
That weren’t quite true,
They said only babies
Should believe in you.”
She climbed in his lap
And gave him a kiss
“If you stopped coming,
You would really be missed.
There are so many children
Who believe in you still
I’ll tell all the others
I promise I will
They’ll have to believe
That you were here
Then you can keep coming
Back every year.”
He gave her a hug
And patted her head
“Thank you my dear,
Now run off to bed.
I promise to come back
Each Christmas Eve,
I’ll deliver my presents
To those who believe.
Faith in the heart
Is my key to each door
If no one believes
I shall be no more.”
He wiped dry his tears
And put on his hat
Walked to the tree
Then picked up his sack.
“Keep this in mind
When your friends still insist
That it couldn’t be me
Because I don’t exist.
Each time a child
Stops believing in me
I become less real
And harder to see.
Merry Christmas dear child
And thank you for seeing
That I really was here
By your fire this evening.
You must have believed
Even though you said no
Without faith in your heart
You never could know.
Your heart would be dark
And you couldn’t have seen
I could never return
And would never have been
Only a story
That never was real
One your parents would tell
This time each year.
Before I must go
I leave you with this,
If you don’t believe,
Then I don’t exist.”

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